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Did He Really?

14 Jul

So I spoke earlier about this guy I met online and things seemed to be going well, when out of the blue I got a text that said not to bother him anymore. See Dating Ass #1.

About three weeks after that crazy text, I got a text then a call at 2:30 in the morning. I ignored them, but then got another text saying it was important and he called again. Thinking something may be wrong, I answered. He asked why I hadn’t contacted him. I reminded him of the text and he said that he didn’t send it. I told him to call me later and let me get back to sleep.

He didn’t call the next day, but on Saturday sent a text at 7 a.m. I replied later that day and asked if knew what appropriate hours were. When we spoke again I asked about the text and he swore he didn’t send it, but that he did get my message that said “why?” I asked why he didn’t respond to that, but he had no real answer.

So for the last couple weeks he has started calling and texting again, even though I have expressed my anger over the first text message. I mean seriously, I’m almost 30. I’m not completely stupid. I know if he didn’t send the message, that a girl he’s seeing probably sent it. My phone has never sent me mysterious text messages before attached to a contacts name.

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What Happened to Courting?

14 Jul

Back in the day, my great-grandmother talked to me about how my grandfather courted her. He picked her up from her home. Spoke with her parents. Brought flowers or other gifts. They sat in the parlor and talked for hours.

Most men nowadays don’t even bother. Many think a horn honk outside is just as good as coming to the door. Men barely give gifts, unless it’s a special occasion, and that’s usually only if you have been dating a while. I know some guys that break up around Thanksgiving, just to get back together after New Year’s so they don’t have to buy holiday gifts.

But I wonder why men changed? Was it the technology? Did the telephone, movies and television make one-on-one conversations unnecessary. What about the feminist movement? Women trying to be equal to men and saying they can open their own doors, pay for their own meals. Did we make men feel like we didn’t need them?

I want a guy that opens doors for me, calls me just to say “I’m thinking about you”, and brings me flowers just because. Though I like a guy that asks where or what I want to do, I also want a guy to make some decisions. Don’t always ask me, you choose something. Show me what you like to do. Don’t ask me out and then expect me to call you on the night of the date. And be considerate. I’m tired of guys that want to take you out after 10 p.m. I think a guy is only thinking of one thing at that time of night.

So can anyone tell me where the men are that still act like gentlemen? And preferably men in my age bracket.

My First Online Relationship

15 Jun

I’ve done the online dating thing before. In fact, years ago before it was very popular. I found it was a great way to weed out some of the guys. A way to get to know someone before you actually went out (cause blind dates suck!). I actually find a really nice guy and we dated for a few years.

Though me and this person had a lot in common, he was several years older than me. Fourteen to be exact, but I think of myself as an old soul. We had fun going out and even staying at home. But as the years passed, it was time to think about where the relationship was headed.

Being older than me, he had already lived a full life, I was just 22 when we met. But often that was what I liked about him. He understood me starting a career, trying to buy a house and a lot of other things that guys my age weren’t doing. He was very encouraging. But after four years I wondered where we were headed.

I soon began to realize it would go nowhere. He had already been married and had children in high school. And made it very clear that he didn’t want anymore children when he had a vasectomy. So even though I cared about this guy a lot, I realized that it would not be the future that I imagined. The wedding, children, family vacations would all be things I would never get from him.

So after tons of talking, we ended things. We’re still friends, but realized that we were in two different places in our lives.  So now I am out there online dating once again. Hoping to find a guy that shares my values and wants the things that I want.